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My life has just been so crazy this month that I have been unable to catch my breath, much less get online for chatting or blogging.
Just as we were getting our bearings of life with a newborn (and learning to juggle grad school, etc), we were told that we needed to move. Our landlord needed to sell the house we were living in, even though he had previously told us we could be there for another two years.
So we were thrown into looking for a new place, then packing, then moving and unpacking. We are now in our new home- and still have boxes and such. School work has fallen waaaay behind.
We have been blessed with an easy baby, but I often feel guilty that we need to take advantage of that and he ends up in a swing while we work on the house or a carseat as we trek around on errands. I want to be spending time with him, face-to-face and focusing only on him, ya know?
He is finally gaining well- in the beginning the WIC people, the pediatrician, and the midwife were all concerned that he was not regaining his birth weight. It took him a month instead of the two weeks they said was the norm. He was born at 7 pounds, 11 ounces. He is now 10 pounds+ at 2 months old, so he is finally on track and getting cute fat baby rolls!
He is rarely fussy- unless he is gassy or hungry. I don't consider that fussy anyway- he is just being communicative in the only way he knows...
He is kicking and flailing his arms a lot, practicing. He is a pro at rolling over from his tummy onto his side or back. He moves his legs in a pre-crawl motion already when he is getting tummy time.
And he EATS!!! OMG, one of the issues we had is me not making enough breast milk for his needs, I think. I still don't and have not had enough time to feed non-stop and pump in between to get my production up to snuff. So we had to supplement with formula. which also makes me feel guilty. But the result is his weight gain. I am hoping once things stabilize and we are unpacked and school work is back on track that we can go back to exclusively breastfeeding. Will I be able to catch up since I am falling behind now? Or will he need formula for the duration now?
He is starting to babble and coo, and he smiles and sometimes laughs. I love it!!!Check out the video I am posting today in his album of his daddy and him howling like wolves!
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Monday, March 1, 2010
Feeling a tad overwhelmed
I have most assuredly fallen behind on all I am expected to do. When I think back to last semester, I was so looking forward to a blissful period of time, spent at home, juggling the needs of my newborn with half time at school, also at home.
I did not anticipate a newborn that needed extra breastfeeding (and the pumping on top of that afterwards, in order to get him to gain weight) or a newborn that would expect to be held most of the time, instead of sleeping on his own (when they tell you newborns sleep 18-22 of 24 hours, don't think that means in a bed somewhere while you accomplish things!)
And I certainly did not expect having to move during this crazy transition time, either. I was told that I could have a couple more years here (and that was reassuring to me, since everything else was in transition)!
I have spent 5-6 hours a day out and about looking for apartments, going to midwife, doctor, and WIC appointments to weigh the baby every two days, and other necessary things. Luckily, Rowan loves the car, and sleeps peacefully during these days. I bring the breastfeeding pillow with us, and feed him wherever we find a quiet out of the way place. Given his Roma blood, no one should be surprised that he is fine with life on the road.
But on the days that I am home I am more frustrated, as he has until recently expected to be held close even when he is not breastfeeding. This has meant not being able to be on the computer as much (esp. when O'bee is not home to take him for a few hours) to do schoolwork (including this blog) to look for places to live, to catch up with email, etc. Add to this some tech difficulties I was having (I could not download pdfs from Moodle when I was able to get online- another huge source of frustration!), and you got one cranky Lily.
It has been an exercise in patience and letting go, I tell you! I have learned a lot from having this baby already. I had a specific plan and experience in mind on how Rowan was going to come into this world and that did not come to pass. However, the most important elements of my plan did- a safe, healthy baby, and a vaginal delivery. It has shown me quite clearly that there is a huge difference between what we want and need- and my needs will be provided for, but perhaps not all of my wants.
In this process of getting a new home, I did some spellwork that took effect quite quickly. I wanted to get a home that was filled with laughter, love, sunshine, community and family gatherings, a safe place for Rowan to grow, a place for us to have a temple again, a place that we could afford, a place for the birds, a place that was stable and would let us stay as long as we wanted. Additionally, there were specific tangibles I wanted: hardwood floors, a place for the washer/dryer, a good place for the bird cages, and 2 bedrooms under what we pay now.
This place that we will sign a lease on meets all that criteria and more. Originally, we saw another unit in the same building, but it did not have hardwood floors (god, I hate carpet!). When I asked the landlord if he would rip up the carpet and give us a better stove, he replied that there was another unit that had hardwood, and would I like that one instead? We looked at it today, and it is even better! Not only is it the original hardwood (not laminate), but the kitchen is awesome- real stone tile, all new on the floors. Real granite countertops- all new. New stove and fridge, never before used. By asking for what I wanted, I got more than what I expected.
Of course, now we have to pack everything, purge what we are not keeping (including a broken car!), and move/unpack when we get there! Breathe!
I did not anticipate a newborn that needed extra breastfeeding (and the pumping on top of that afterwards, in order to get him to gain weight) or a newborn that would expect to be held most of the time, instead of sleeping on his own (when they tell you newborns sleep 18-22 of 24 hours, don't think that means in a bed somewhere while you accomplish things!)
And I certainly did not expect having to move during this crazy transition time, either. I was told that I could have a couple more years here (and that was reassuring to me, since everything else was in transition)!
I have spent 5-6 hours a day out and about looking for apartments, going to midwife, doctor, and WIC appointments to weigh the baby every two days, and other necessary things. Luckily, Rowan loves the car, and sleeps peacefully during these days. I bring the breastfeeding pillow with us, and feed him wherever we find a quiet out of the way place. Given his Roma blood, no one should be surprised that he is fine with life on the road.
But on the days that I am home I am more frustrated, as he has until recently expected to be held close even when he is not breastfeeding. This has meant not being able to be on the computer as much (esp. when O'bee is not home to take him for a few hours) to do schoolwork (including this blog) to look for places to live, to catch up with email, etc. Add to this some tech difficulties I was having (I could not download pdfs from Moodle when I was able to get online- another huge source of frustration!), and you got one cranky Lily.
It has been an exercise in patience and letting go, I tell you! I have learned a lot from having this baby already. I had a specific plan and experience in mind on how Rowan was going to come into this world and that did not come to pass. However, the most important elements of my plan did- a safe, healthy baby, and a vaginal delivery. It has shown me quite clearly that there is a huge difference between what we want and need- and my needs will be provided for, but perhaps not all of my wants.
In this process of getting a new home, I did some spellwork that took effect quite quickly. I wanted to get a home that was filled with laughter, love, sunshine, community and family gatherings, a safe place for Rowan to grow, a place for us to have a temple again, a place that we could afford, a place for the birds, a place that was stable and would let us stay as long as we wanted. Additionally, there were specific tangibles I wanted: hardwood floors, a place for the washer/dryer, a good place for the bird cages, and 2 bedrooms under what we pay now.
This place that we will sign a lease on meets all that criteria and more. Originally, we saw another unit in the same building, but it did not have hardwood floors (god, I hate carpet!). When I asked the landlord if he would rip up the carpet and give us a better stove, he replied that there was another unit that had hardwood, and would I like that one instead? We looked at it today, and it is even better! Not only is it the original hardwood (not laminate), but the kitchen is awesome- real stone tile, all new on the floors. Real granite countertops- all new. New stove and fridge, never before used. By asking for what I wanted, I got more than what I expected.
Of course, now we have to pack everything, purge what we are not keeping (including a broken car!), and move/unpack when we get there! Breathe!
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